Perverts Fans of Arrested Development Perverts rejoice today is Alia Shawkat’s 18th birthday. Best known for starring as Maeby in the best show ever televised, Shawkat was at one point a source of traffic for this blog when we were at the old EditMe URL. I’m not exactly sure what post or posts led to that being the case, nor who wrote them (it wasn’t me, I can assure you of that), but this quote in response to today being her birthday demonstrates their possible nature:
“Blog that shit!!! We need to get back to the top of the Alia Shawkat Tits search results!”
NB: Yes, I absolutely posted this completely-not-provocative photo of her on purpose, you sickos; I’m no Pete Townsend.
- The Quail
Update: We were, and evidently still are the #1 Google hit for the search “Alia Shawkat Tits.” We won’t relinquish this distinction without a fight. We also used to be pretty high up the list for the “Jesus dildo” search but no longer. Ahem … JESUS DILDO JESUS DILDO. The post that started it all in comments. (swoosh!) GONG! -PETE
2 responses so far ↓
Shark // Apr 18, 2007 at 8:02 pm
Alia Shawkat Tits. Alia Shawkat Tits.
PETE // Apr 18, 2007 at 9:06 pm
Shaw… KAT!
Now that Lindsay Lohan looks like she belongs in a segment on Cops, I have been forced to find new hot chicks with freckles and big boobs to lust after. Enter Alia Shawkat, aka Maeby Fünke of Arrested Development, television’s best show… ever?
No.
Anyhow, as you can see [photo missing] she is smoking hot and also, as I just discovered today, recently of legal age … to drive. But the good news doesn’t stop there! Unlike Lohan, Alia already has giant boobs at 16 which means that once she gets famous it’ll be much harder for jealous girls with low self-esteem to start and/or propagate vicious rumors about her…
“Oh my God! He boobs are TOTALLY fake! How do I know? Just LOOK at them! They’re big and she’s famous! It’s that simple! Yes that’s how! Look how fake they look in this picture of her! And by ‘fake’ I of course mean ‘bigger than mine.’ Oh my God you are totally just saying that because you’re in love with her and because there’s absolutely zero evidence that she ever had an operation: no before-and-after shots, no visible scarring that wasn’t obviously photo-shopped, and no break in her schedule of public appearences long enough for her to have recovered from the operation … but mostly because you’re in love with her! God! You’re so naive! Just LOOK at how big they are!”
Whatever. Don’t worry, Sweet Alia. The Jo-Tel has your back … until you turn 18 and start fucking up.
Posted by PETE 6/2/05 5:49pm
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