THE JO-TEL … illegal blog downfield

Let me set the stage there’s a little puppy
You’ve got to comb out his tangled fur because he
Is the sign of your Great Dominance over
His paws which are slurpees.
So there’s a puppy and he is filled with slurpees
Like no other slurpee you’ve ever seen
Without the collar you might think him icy but he’s a […]

http://mcsweeneys.net/2008/2/20dargenio.html
-Shark

The Long March is a manifesto. It has proclaimed to the world that the Red Army is an army of heroes, while the imperialists and their running dogs, Chiang Kai-shek and his like, are impotent. It has proclaimed their utter failure to encircle, pursue, obstruct and intercept us. The Long March … has announced to […]

This is an excerpt from one of Hip E.’s journals. (Hip E.: I swear I only saw this because it fell off the shelf and opened to this page while I was trying to pull out Dan the Automator’s Neufonia Must Die. This entry isn’t really personal, though, and doesn’t involve anyone who […]

I wrote these poems while I was bored between rounds coaching a law school moot court competition in Chicago last weekend.  Generally, I write two types of poem collections: (1) the ones whose design and execution I toil over for months; and (2) those ones that are one-offed in a few days.  It's unclear which […]

One time, there was this dude in our fraternity named Pat. He wanted everyone to call him “Big Cat,” which is a pretty cool nickname. I remember once, some of us pledges stood around and listened to him hold court on “sloots.” It’s been several years, but I vaguely recall it was something about how […]

I don’t think that Charlie wants to hear about Red Smitty right now.
- Emilio Estevez as “Billy the Kid” in Young Guns
Five inside the morning light on the ground
Pondering the crushed smell all around
My face just turns over in sleep sun
Find your four sheets twisted to the going day
Someone like Hawkeye chasing a deer into […]